T20 - Jedis and Wizards in Middle Earth... Part II

The HP team supporters cast Lumos spell on all the lights and the stadium comes alive, presenting a brilliant spectacle. The Star wars team, led by Yoda fly slowly to the pitch in their pods. They huddle together to discuss about their strategy, that was worked out by Yoda and R2D2 with C3PO as an interpreter. Finally, they disperse to their assigned positions wishing each other with the words, “Let the Force be with you”. The Harry Potter team’s opening batsmen, Ron (with a wand) and Hagrid (with a club) walk to the pitch to the thunderous ovation that came from their supporters awaiting the start of the battle.

Ron, at the strikers end, waits patiently for the first delivery. The whole stadium erupts as Gandalf signals the start of the match and Obi Wan Kenobi is raring to bowl the first delivery. Ron, with his wand raised concentrates hard on Obi Wan’s run-up. As the ball( a lightsaber-proof one) comes at a blinding speed to the stumps, Ron tries to cast a flipendo spell on the ball to just defend but without Hermiones assistance ,forgets the way it has to be pronounced and ends up saying Flopendoooo. The ball skids on and rattles the middle stump. Star Wars team draw first blood.

Hermione takes guard at the strikers end and Obi Wan gears up for the next delivery. Hermione drives one straight down the ground with a powerful Flipendo spell. Boundary as there is no long on or long off and the Veela girls start dancing by a Tarantallegra.The next delivery – Hermione,uses the Impedimenta spell to slow down the ball and when it has almost stopped, uses Wingardium Leviosa to hoist the ball and make it land in the stands. The ball drifts toward the fineleg boundary and Haan in his Pod keeps ogling at the Veela girls and completely ignores the ball. Six! The next three deliveries turn out to be well disguised short balls which Hermione just defends. The score- 10/1 in 1 over.

Ad - Fred and George Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes shop.

Luke Skywalker is all set to bowl the second over. Hagrid keeps his club raised, ready to strike and grins at Madame Maxime in the crowd. Luke bowls a fast delivery and before Hagrid could strike, it races to the keeper Leia. Hagrid misses 3 more deliveries and the HP section of the crowd is silenced. Hagrid smiles at Maxime before the fourth ball, but she turns away in disappointment. Hagrid, in a web of fury, slaps the ball hard into the stands, not giving the fielders any chance. The last delivery turns out to be an excellent bouncer which hits Hagrid hard in the chin and suddenly the ball just vanishes. Manjo, standing in the slips, walks to the batsman to search for the ball, and it suddenly drops from Hagrid’s might beard. Manjo dives to his right and secures a catch. Two down for HP team. The Star Wars section hoot loudly as the giant takes a long walk back to the pavilion, crestfallen. The score- 16/1 in 2 overs. Hermione and the new batsman, Dumbledore play some intelligent cricket and take the score to 69 at the end of 8 overs.

Drinks break. Draco Malfoy, the 12th man is made to bring in refreshments for his team. Furious over not being selected in the main 11, Draco takes a minute off to tell Darth Vader he’ll do anything to bring down his team. And finally, Draco casts the Confund\us charm on Dumbledore just before the end of the break. Dumbledore is bowled out the very next ball from Haan. Dumbledore, confused over the path to the pavilion, bumps into Haan and Rita Skeeter in the audience takes a picture of the bumping act. Voldemort, the next man in, defends the first two deliveries. The next delivery, he casts the Avifors spell on the ball. The ball changes into a bird and flies towards the boundary. The next two deliveries meet with the same fate. The score- 87/3 in 9 overs. The following three overs were of mixed fortunes for HP team. Darth Vader, a spinner, before bowling the 13th over, gets his robotic arm programmed by R2D2 so that he can add leg spin and off spin to the same delivery. Hermione, caught unawares by the delivery, gets out. Snape,Fred and George Weasley follow suit in the same over as Darth Vader notches up a hat-trick. 110/7 in 13 overs

Meanwhile, a section of the Star Wars crowd make some racist remarks at Manjo, the only brown player of the match.
Harry Potter, the next man in, walks to the strikers end as the crowd chants his name. Harry casts a Conjunctivitis spell to damage the bowlers eyesight. With a straying line and a disorderly length, Harry takes up most of the strike(enna than irunthaalum hero aache) devours a run feast , builds a 50 run partnership in 5 overs with Voldemort, who contributes only 11 runs.

19th over. Palpatine, the Sith Lord bowls a quick out swinger which hits Voldemort in the legs. As the whole Star Wars team claims a leg before decision, Gandalf nods his head slowly and the HP team lose their 8th wicket. Krum plays out the the next 2 deliveries and then hits 2 consecutive fours. He finally gets out in the last deliver. Darth Vader, looking for a 5 wkt haul and Harry(on 39) craving for a 50. The first two balls fetch 10 runs for Harry,who moves onto 49. Darth Vader bowls three beauties which leaves harry completely flummoxed. The score-178/9.

The last ball of the match – everyone on their feet, ready to witness a fantastic last ball duel between Harry and Darth Vader. Rita holds her camera tight focusing on Harry. Darth before the run-up, threatens Dudley that he will let out a snake near him if he runs during the final delivery. Darth bowls a off-leg-off break and Harry with mighty concentration just pushes the ball into the gaps with a spell, runs to the other end and raises his wand in joy of reaching a half century. The crowd, in contrast to what he expected was hushed in absolute silence. Wondering what had went wrong, Harry turns slowly to his right to find Dudley, shuddering and rooted to the crease…

T20 - Jedis and Wizards in Middle Earth... Part I

T20 Match

Star Wars team vs Harry Potter world

The captains, Yoda and Dumbledore walk out to the center of the pitch for the toss, amidst a deafening noise from the stands. The dementors, students of Hogwarts, clones and a few people from different planets of the Galaxy occupied the side stands, while the Ministers of Magic, Death Eaters, Hogwarts staff, the Jedi council and the rulers of all the planets in the galaxy are seated in the pavilion block.

Cheerleaders for the HP team - Veela girls from Beauxbatons Academy.

As agreed by the two teams, the match is conducted in a cricket stadium called Middle Earth in a neutral venue. As per the cricketing regulations, umpire and the referee shouldn’t be of the same clan as of the opposing teams. Hence, Gandalf the gray is the umpire and Sauron is the match referee.Your commentators – Jar Jar Binks and Neville Longbottom.

The match referee Sauron tosses the Ring in the air, after announcing that Yoda wins if the side having the inscribed words faces him. Yoda eventually wins the toss and says in his trademark way, “Bowl first, we will”.

The line up...
HP team
Dumbledore(captain),Harry,Hermione,Ron,Voldemort,Snape,Draco,Krum,Dudley,Fred,George.
Star Wars team
Yoda(captain),Luke,Leia,Hann,Obi-Wan,Qui-Gon,DarthVader,Palpatine,Manjo,R2D2,

Pre match presentation - SportsCenter, LIVE on ESPN!
(OKay, I do know that SPorts Center is not a prematch pres show but I couldn't find a better picture!!)

Hosted by Jar Jar Binks and Neville Longbottom!

An hour before the show starts and 10 minutes before the cameramen and crew arrived…
Neville and Jar Jar are shuffling their papers and rehearsing their lines. Neville takes his remembrall outside and notices that it has turned red. He checks to make sure that all the papers are in the right order. After mulling over what he has forgotten to bring to the studio, he decides that his remembrall is malfunctioning. An hour passes by and the show goes on well, with Neville not forgetting a single line.
The final lines…

JJB – A great game on the cards. Mesa support Star Wars. Mesa looking forward to the match like yousa. Thankyousa.
Neville – For all the galaxy wide viewers, you can catch live action of the match in a few moments. And I hope the Harry Potter team beats the pants off the Starwars team. Its Neville and JarJarBinks signing off, without anymore fancy pants talk.

JJB and Neville stand up to shake hands as Sports Center’s end-of-the-show music is being played. And Neville realizes why his remembrall is glowing blood red.

Neville wasn't wearing his pants!



Jar Jar Binks (left) and Neville Longbottom

55 FICTION

The Emerald Lady..

"Her name is Katrina ", said an old friend when I inquired about his new girlfriend. He praised her green eyes, curly hair and the emerald ear-ring. After he left, his words kept ringing in my head. Shocked, I looked at the photo of my late wife, her emerald ear-ring matching the color of her eyes.......



55 Fiction is a form of microfiction that refers to the works of fiction limited to a maximum of fifty-five words..

Am a Baaad Man...

The clock struck 9pm.
In his abandoned ancient half-ruined mansion hidden away in the hills,a boisterous cacophony of the sounds of a battery of cannons firing,which was his alarm sound originated from the clock in his bedroom and resonated along the narrow hallways and finally the hall with a high ceiling. He slowly pulled himself upright, opened his eyes like the curtain raising on stage and stared with bloodshot eyes at the clock, surrounded by an array of skeletons of deer,rhino,lion and other dangerous animals that he had hunted. He got down from the bed and clapped his hands as his manservant came rushing into the room with his dark black coat and helped him into it. The manservant then handed the wrist watch,with its time sync with the clock, to him and receded to the door.

He walked towards the oval-shaped mirror positioned at one of the corners of the room and gave a long cold stare at himself and the watch as the manservant waited near the large oak door.

Bang!
The manservant dropped to the floor and scarlet colored blood gushed out of his temples.
He slipped the shotgun into his pocket,wore dark glasses and meddled for a second with his watch.He then walked over the corpse drenched in a pool of blood, down the dim-lit stairs to the hall where all his henchmen had aggrouped and sat down on his exquisitely made brown maple furniture, lighted his cigar and puffed out x shaped smoke patterns. He looked at the other big clock in the hall, with its time synchronised with the one in his bedroom . His advisor walked to him, announced that his meeting with other top international notorious smugglers and druggists was due at 10 pm and stood back.

He ordered one of his man-servants to bring him some roasted chicken and noodles for dinner. While he crunched the chicken and munched down the food slowly(which was unusual), the enticingly hot young girl danced around the hall erotically. He noticed out of the corner of his eye that Ronnie, one of his henchman was looking anxiously at the clock and going out of d room silently whenever his shirt pocket appeared bright due to his mobile's illumination.After guttling down every piece of eatable on the plate and smacking the girl hard, he washed his hands as his advisor announced to him that there was only a minute to go for 10pm, i.e the meeting.He was late already.

He walked towards Ronnie.Giving him a warm smile, he positioned Ronnie's tie intact and stood back as everyone gasped on seeing his favourite hitman Ronnie collapse, blood oozing out of his pierced throat. He cleaned the stains of blood from his surgical knife, picked up Ronnie's mobile and stared at it till a message flashed.

"Time is ten nw. The bomb in his watch shouldve detonated.He and the other smugglers should be dead now. Good work Inspector Ronnie. Mission accomplished. Where should i meet you 2moro?"

He replied to the message,

"IN HELL... **** U COPS"

and asks his advisor to find the cop who was messaging by tracking down the number.
And leaves to the meeting in his car,still wearing his watch!










The watch showed 9.01 pm and wasnt ticking.

CN Party !

The Fictional Government
Headed by The Mask

Environment Dept - Captain Planet and his crew

The five youngsters and Captain Planet can carry on their after episode cleanliness awareness segment on CN and take care of the Environment. Any issues regarding plastic use or effluent wastage draine in the rivers can be easily solved... GO PLANET and in our case GO india ... with local flavour - Chakde India !!!

The Police Department - ' 'men

Superman, Spiderman, Batman and Phantom can patrol the whole nation for a change. Right from body guarding the PM to saving the small kitten stranded in a tree.
Spiderman, mind you - you are a part of police dept, so don't go around kissing people in dark dim-lit alleys, both normally or dangling clumsily from mid-air.

Woman inequality? The girls created from sugar, spice and everything nice will take care of everything thats not so nice to women society. And also shield from monkey trouble.

CBI - Scooby Dooby Doo and gang can take care of detective and espionage work, with some help from Tweety,Sylv and Granny.

Military - G.I.J.O.E troops will guard the nation border
Swat Kats - Tbone and Centurion's Ace make up the Air Force
Land - Rockwell of Centurions fame and Swatkat Razor
Marine - The sailor man Popeye
And the Defense General - He-Man

Financial Minister - Uncle Scrooge, the riches fictional character will take care of the national treasury, though he wont be allowed to bathe in it as he usually does. This frugal candidate will see to that not even a penny, or in our case paisa is lost wastefully.

Research Wing - Dexter will lead the Research sector of the country and provide solutions to India' problems, with support from Jetson family's expertise.
Johnny Bravo will be the typical celebrity turned politician.
Ed, Edd and Eddy will form the new-age paritran political party in an attempt to topple the government.

Wildlife - Dino the Dinosaur, leased from Freddy Flinstone, Pink Panther, Yogi the Bear, Road Runner and Jungle Book Characters will be employed in Wildlife Sanctuaries and subsequently India will evolve as the the most favourite hotspot of the world.

Agriculture - Popeye will hold multiple topdog posts. The active protagonist of Spinach can do it on a muchbigger scale and on a wider variety of crops. Wonder if he can gulp down a whole pumpkin !

Bugs Bunny will be the President. If the party is found to be incapable, then he ll dissolve the parliament with the iconic

THATS ALL FOLKS !!!

Proverbs - Bang Bang Bang !!

One-liner comments for common proverbs....


There is no substitute for hardwork
Now Mr.Hardwork is a Fullback or striker?

Rolling Stone gathers no m'a'ss
But Mike Jagger did

Pennywise and pound foolish
Yup, girlfriends and boyfriends respectively

Better late than never
And why doesnt my professor understand this?

A bird in hand is better than two in the bush
Esp when youve got a meaty turkey to the two little pigeons in the bush

A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle
It does..Uniqueness

A coward dies a thousand times before his death. The valiant tastes of death but once
Wait a minute. Isn't die a verb form of Death?

United we stand, divided we fall
And the Indian team is united only while falling

A jack of all trades is a master of none.
So India better stop their futile attempts on their scouting for an all-rounder

A penny saved is a penny earned
But the converse is not true

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Is someone fond of Veerappan

Actions speak better than words
Sreeshanth, you listening?

All's fair in love and war.
Emami effect?

Barking dogs seldom bite.
My college dogs dont even bark.

Blood is thicker than water.
Duh, me aint that bad in chemistry.

Empty vessel makes more noise
My dear Navjot Sidhu

Cleanliness is next to godliness
Not even in a dictionary

Don't fall before you're pushed.
CR!

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.
And say tata to your girlfriend

What goes up must come down
But the problem is that MIG 21s are coming down a bit too soon after take off!

Slow and steady wins the race.
But not Twenty20

Laughter is the best medicine
Pharmacies should be filled with comics, and koundamani wouldve been the best doc in the world

Love is blind
Which should explain Soundarya's "hey avan smart ah irukaan la" comment about vijaykanth in the movie thavasi.

Courtesy costs nothing.
Free stuff lacks quality :D

Clothes dont maketh a man
Ya, am old enough to know the actual process that goes into the making of a man !!!

Of Fiction,Fantasy and Fables...

I sit back in my blue cushioned chair, with two protruding arms, offering no support to my constantly typing hands, as my mind is clouded by different problems of a eighteen year old. The current problem however is that I dont have any immediate-solution-demanding problem to tackle or being victimised or to be nailed and eventually overcoming it, thus achieving something...

Maybe perhaps probably I should consult Mr.Harry Potter, the boy who lived ( as if we are dead corpses) about what he does when he is all alone in his room other than having an affair with loneliness, no.12 Privet Drive... Too bad I dont have a cousin who is as stupid as Dudley and as a matter of fact there is no cousin who lives under my roof, and even above it.

It wouldve been great to have a brother in here with me, where we can turn Hardy Boys and solve mysteries adventurously in an utopian world, where everything goes wrong initially for us ( hardy boys) but strangely culminating with everything going right.
Or have some cousins like every Enid Blyton book's character has, and go seeking places offering mysteries, which had been somehow eluding all others before.
Or form a Secret Seven Society, with stupid passwords to enter our HQ( where noone else will bother to come in) , but there is no farm house here though.
Or form an investigating trio with fellow vetti mates, the Three Investigators and have Mr.Hitchcock to guide us out of problems, which were created by him in the first place.
Or have a *a prefix*friend in Nancy Drew, and help her solve mysteries with her cute friends.
Or gain the unearthly powers of an Animorph, to morph into a parrot ( now Deepika Padukone has a parrot in her bedroom right? )
Or like in some Goosebumps book, having the power to turn a werewolf during halloween and take revenge on the guy who had stolen my pencil box, or enter a toy factory, where I get locked up for a night and fight the 'dangerous' barbie dolls or learn how to fly, making the rival for a gal go jealous over it, lead him into trouble and have a 'happily forever' ending.
Or have fun with Mickey and Minnie in my garden, though my mom will not like the idea of having rats at home, and if I do, she will have to employ Tom, who is already having enough trouble getting kicked all over by Jerry.
Nor does my home need 'another' Goofy ;)
Or there shouldve been a Uncle Scrooge for me, thus enabling me to have a bath in dollars ( or pounds if Mickey comics is from Britain) and dimes.
Or have Donald and Daisy ducks, along with Hewey, Dewey and Louie for fun, but being a strict non-vegetarian, mmmm...second thoughts over that.
Or Kalavakkam should be modified completely to Riverdale, and stay all day at Uncle Pops with my Archie gang ( xpt Reggie) , flirting with Veronica and buying Juggie hamburgers to keep him away.
Or turn a hunter as Shikari Shambu and tackle wild situations with luck and ending up with undeserving glory.
Or have a funny servant like Suppandi, who will stand under the sweltering sun waiting for his sweat to be dried up like wet clothes !

But all this is unlikely to happen.

So I had resort to writing a blog and take away some of your time...Now thats an achievement !